There is something really amazing about people around the world. They all look very different, have different colors and speak different languages.

But they have one starking similarity — their basic human nature. More so, they respond to the same psychological triggers, have same basic instincts and even indulge in same kind of politics.

That similarity reminds me of something. At some stage of life, one encounters someone who we label as Difficult. I know I’ve had more than my share of Difficult People to deal with.

The really wonderful thing about all these difficult people is that they suck every bit of productivity out of you and they never let you do things the way you’d want them to be done.

The easiest way to handle such situations is to either walk out of the situation or throw the difficult person out.

But it is always not so easy or just possible at all. So, what should you do in that situation and How to Deal With Difficult People?

Why are Difficult People Difficult?

1. They Suffer from Inferiority Complex. Chances are that if they feel that they are inferior to you or others, they will try to belittle you or others just to pump up their self esteem.

2. They Feel Insecure. If they feel threatened from you because of one reason or another, they might behave the way they are behaving just to feel secure.

3. They Feel Frustrated. Are they frustrated with their work or life? That’s another major reason why people behave badly with others — just to vent their frustrations.

4. They are Just Sadists. Does this even need an explanation?

5. Different Ideologies and Beliefs. Conflicting ideologies and beliefs is another major cause of frustration and anger — both of which cause people to behave badly.

6. They are trying to Test Your Limits. I had a customer who consistently used to crib. Then I found that she did it only because my staff always used to give her concessions to stop her cribbing. Some people have found an easy way to get a bargain.

How to Deal With Difficult People - 5 Tactics

1. Listen to what they have to say. If you encourage them — directly or indirectly — to speak out, you will find their insecurities and frustrations. Once you know that, you can start tackling those problems one by one.

2. Make them feel valued and appreciated. The easiest way to make someone feel valued is to recognize their work. If they have done something great, let it be known publicly. It’s the easiest way to increase their self-esteem.

3. Encourage them to make small changes. Small changes to their work and life routine can make huge changes to their behavior. Use direct and indirect methods to encourage the change.

4. Use the Power of Social Proof. When people see their peer group doing something then they also have a tendency to do the same thing. I will be writing about Social Proof and how to use it to change people in another post. =) Stay tuned!

5. Show them the limits. Sometimes, you have to just clearly tell them that they are crossing the line and they should not be doing it. However, it should be done only after you have tried out everything else.

So there you have it, a simple guide on how to deal with difficult people. But it is easier said than done. Dealing with difficult people required rational thinking.

The reason why you felt that the person was difficult is because the person either made you angry or frustrated or hurt your ego. And when you are angry or your ego is hurt then it is very difficult to not let your emotions cloud your rational thinking.

However, you can find solace in the fact that you will keep getting better at dealing with such people with experience. =)